Barbara Strauch, deputy science editor and health and medical science editor at the New York Times, maintains that middle-aged brains “are surprisingly competent and surprisingly talented.” As humans reach midlife, Strauch argues, their brains begin to reorganized – to act and think differently. In her well researched and highly accessible book, The Secret Life of the Grown-up Brain: The Surprising Talents of the Middle-Aged Mind, Straunch offers a lot of good news. Among other things, scientists have found that moving into middle age generally offers a journey into a happier time, in part because of how you start to use your brain. And, while losses occur by middle-age, they are neither as uniform nor as drastic as science had once feared. There are distinct declines in neurotransmitters that keep you alert and on the move. There are decreases in brain branches, where neurons communicate. And there is the emergence of a default mode – a daydreaming state of quiet and continuous inner chatter - to which your brain increasingly goes as you age – that leaves you a bit more distracted. But, people in middle age begin to use both sides of their brains instead of one - called bilateralization - pursuant to which you learn to recruit the strength of your brain’s remaining prefrontal cortex, as a sort of “cognitive reserve.” Moreover, there is science to support that activities as simple as continuing education or work activities can create a formidable buffer against the effects of aging. Keep Reading »
Posts Tagged ‘Transition’
Middle Aged Brains
First Regret
Bronnie Ware, author of The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, identifies, as the most common regret of all, “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Five Regrets. I thought it might be worth our while to drill down this a bit on this regret to see what we can learn.
Now, I must begin with a caveat. In my eight years as a hospice volunteer, I really haven’t heard all that many regrets. I certainly haven’t heard enough of them to accumulate lists, identify patterns, or establish rankings. It may be that so many of our residents have lost cognitive capacity, don’t speak English or, having been “rescued” from the city’s streets or prisons or other horrific my circumstances, that discussion of regrets is either not possible or not a high priority. Most of my conversations with residents concern the here and now – the next meal, pain management, the day’s events pertaining to the individual or family, the evening’s television schedule. Regrets, to the extent that they arise at all, accompany life review conversations, in which residents attempt to find meaning in what has transpired in their lives. You may recall the hospice story that I previously published about Chloe, who in her final hours, attempted to reconcile her desire to be a good mother with the fact that her sons were forcibly removed from her custody due to the extremes of her schizophrenia. Her regret was specific — she had failed in her maternal expectations. But at life’s end, she was able to alter her perception, eliminate her regret, and find redemption in the fact that surrendering her sons was the “best mothering” of which she was capable in light of her mental illness. Keep Reading »
Recalibrating Careers
My friend, Frank Yatsu, M.D., died shortly before a 5000 doctors survey conducted by The Doctors Company, the nation’s largest physician and surgeon medical liability insurer, revealed that 9 out of 10 of the country’s physicians are unwilling to recommend the profession to others. Frank, an emeritus UT Professor of Neurology and former Department Chair, and I had intended to write an article for a medical journal career on job dissatisfaction in medicine.Don’t Wait A startling 43% of surveyed physicians further declared that they are contemplating retirement as result of “transformative changes” in health care system, which will only exacerbate the existing physician shortage. That’s is not great news, as the federal Affordable Care Act adds an additional 32 million Americans into the healthcare system by 2014. Keep Reading »
Blessings of Age
I sat with a young colleague the other evening who was bemoaning his fate as he crossed into his mid forties. He couldn’t carouse as he used to. He was losing muscle mass and stamina. His hairline was receding. Some of the early ticks of memory were beginning to show. He wasn’t sure how he could keep up with his youthful expectations at the rate of decline that he was experiencing. He turned to me and asked, “How do you continue to do it at your age?”
I was glad that he asked. This is what I told him:
I can’t tell you what a blessing it is to mature! I get up every morning with gratitude for the fact that I am still here. I love and am loved by my family and a few friends. I am privileged to do work that I love. I am not pursuing anything that is not consistent with my constantly evolving sense of my life’s purpose. I continue to evolve the manner in which I practice law to bring a more refined and subtle integrity to what I do, serving my clients while creating the most abundant outcomes for all parties involved. Keep Reading »
Five Regrets
I was forwarded, by one of you, an article from a British newspaper on the forthcoming publication of a book by Bronnie Ware entitled The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departed. While I only just have ordered the book, I thought that its themes, as described in The Guardian article, were worthy of discussion now. Ware had served as a palliative care nurse in Australia, caring for patients at the end of their lives. She had collected their end of life observations and written about them at her Inspiration and Chai blog. Much as I have observed, Ware began to see common themes and extraordinary wisdom that seems to blossom in people as their lives draw to a close. Interestingly, Ware heard about “regrets,” a topic not as common to me in my work. But she recorded the end of life epiphanies as a lesson plan for the living and moved from blogging into authoring her book. Keep Reading »
Stand Up Meetings, the latest “new” thing
An early February article in the Wall Street Journal described the practice for daily meeting attendance at Atomic Object, a Grand Rapids Michigan software development firm. The early-morning daily meetings are subject to a few strict rules: mandatory attendance; minimum chit chat; and everyone has to stand. Sitting is equated with sloth. There is no room for long-windedness. Tables even have been removed to prevent “leaning.” The meetings generally last about 5 minutes, followed by a quick stretch, then everyone is “off to work.” While standup meetings are nothing new (military leaders did it during World War I and various companies have adopted standup meetings over the years), the current inspiration is being attributed to the growing use of “Agile,” an approach to software development, which according to the Journal was “crystallized in a manifesto published by 17 software professionals in 2001.” It calls for compressing the development projects into short pieces and involves daily standup meetings where participants quickly update their peers on three things: what they have done since yesterday; what they will do today; and any obstacles that stand in their way. Keep Reading »
Coach, Observe Thyself!
I woke up Saturday morning a little bummed. I had noticed that in recent weeks I had felt out of sorts. It wasn’t a bad mood. It was more of a sense of being perpetually “jammed.” So I am a coach. I listen to the plight of others, attempting to foster in my clients new perspectives which allow them to overcome their difficulties. Maybe I could apply a little coaching to myself. The practice that I often use in assisting clients to gain a new or broader perspective is called “self observation.” It consists of monitoring your behaviors, thoughts, and emotions to see exactly what gives rise to sense of being “stuck.” Keep Reading »
So, What Do You Think Happens Next?
One question, that arises from conversations about my hospice work, never has been asked of me in a group setting. It usually is put to me in a “sidebar,” in muted tones. Strangers never ask this question. It, apparently, is reserved for friends. “So, what do you think really happens when you die?” I don’t consider it an odd question, nor a particularly intimate one. In many respects, I wish it were a more prominent subject of conversation. But, it brings with it a lot of baggage. And, even in writing about it here, I undertake no small risk. Why risk? If you think about it, many of our beliefs, judgments and social values are derivatives of an attempt to answer that simple question. Whatever I believe, no matter how carefully considered or stated, will offend someone. Keep Reading »
Serving at the End of Another’s Life, Part 2
At the outset of my work as a hospice volunteer, there were things that put me off. I don’t necessarily recall what my emotional responses were those many years ago, because I have learned to live with them. One category of offense that I have learned to live with stems from olfactory responses to conditions such as feces, stale urine, vomit and necrotic tissue. Smell triggers ancient fear responses. I have learned no way to overcome them, except to carry a small supply of Vick’s VapoRub or other ointment, which I apply to my nasal passages. This allows me time to deal with the immediate situation, which usually is cleaned up in relatively short order. I imagine that this is enough to turn many of you off. But let me put it in context. Keep Reading »
Serving at the End of Another’s Life
There is a question which inevitably follows my disclosure that I’ve been serving as a Zen Hospice Project volunteer for eight years at San Francisco’s Laguna Honda Hospital. The question varies somewhat, but usually is framed — “Isn’t your work frightening/saddening/depressing?” Then, there is the follow-up question — “How do you do it?” There also are two recurring comments. The first is — “I could never do that.” The second comes from those who have witnessed hospice service — “When my [loved one] was approaching life’s end, the hospice workers were like angels.”
This weekend I was at a retreat at Rancho Bernardo, just outside of San Diego, with my new McKenna Long real estate colleagues at which these questions and comments frequently came up. I realize that I had never really expressed, in this space, my “truth” about what this work means to me and I thought I might take the opportunity to do so now. What I have to say might be described differently by other ZHP volunteers. But I imagine that the essence of their responses would be much the same. So here goes. Keep Reading »
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